Makes a Man Cheat?
By Ali Khalid Abdullah,
June 12, 2006
There are many reasons why a man would cheat on his significant
other, but they are varied and complex, and they also relate to
the character of person in question.
Many men who cheat are unsure of their worth and have a need to
constantly prove their own relevance. Others cheat because of a
lack of good morals, or spiritual and ethical principals. While,
still others cheat because they haven't learned how to be loyal
and faithful committed to a woman (regardless of how good she is
If we examine the concept of cheating (of unfaithfulness and two-timing),
we encounter some fundamental misplaced value judgments. That is,
we see a need to conquer and conquest, which does offer a momentary
sense of adequacy. But it is fleeting. In order to continue the
euphoric pleasure, one has to constantly repeat the act. It is similar
to the addict, who takes drugs and alcohol in excess.
Cheating is also ultimately an act of failure because, more often
than not, it destroys trust, respect, loyalty, honesty, love and
the moral fibers of family (i.e. husband, wife, intimate relationships,
friendships, social cohesion). The cheater and the cheated both
end up unhappy in the long run.
A man who feels compelled to cheat on his woman does not fully love,
value, treasure or cherish her. Otherwise, he would consciously
refrain from committing the act. Usually, cheating is purely as
an act of sexual gratification, an act of animal lust.
Men are visual creatures as opposed to women, who are as a rule
more emotionally stimulated to what moves them inwardly. So, many
cheating men seek new flesh, regardless of how wholesomely good
their women are. I don't cheat because I have a different value
system and a different consciousness - a consciousness that isn't
superficial or laden by an interest in physical looks, but is impressed
by character, content, spiritual union, mental oneness, etc. However,
I was not always this way. I grew and learned to value the feelings
of a woman, and my own feelings as well.
Men and women who feel it is not an issue to cheat will never find
out what true happiness is.
Revenge cheating is no better than the cheating of the initial perpetrator.
Revenge cheating is nothing more than a desperate cry to get even.
And to do so cheapens one's own self-esteem. So, in my opinion,
both kinds of cheating is no good.
If a woman has suffered from cheating, she needs to move forward
and not to judge all men based on her past experiences. The same
applies to a man. Faithful love and relationships are the hallmark
principles of God, and of every religious and social standing. However,
whether we choose to honor and respect as individuals is another
Ali Khalid Abdullah
Mound Correctional Facility
17601 Mound Road
Detroit, MI 48212
Ali Khalid Abdullah has a Bachelor's degree in Behavioral Science
and is completing a Master's degree in Political Science. His political
and humanitarian involvements are many. Ali Khalid Abdullah has
dreams of seeing the world united, without war, hunger and poverty.
He wishes to contribute to making the world a better place for all
inhabitants, including animals. He aspires to be a good human being
and hopes to be a good husband and father one day, and to reach
out to many people. He hopes that we can save our planet from global
destruction and preserve a livable future for the millions of babies
that are today coming into the world. He would like to see people
shake up the current political stranglehold on the world's economy,
and to eradicate capitalism so that all people's basic material
means can be met. He aspires to destroy all elements of imperialism,
racism, sexism, xenophobia, and acknowledges that accomplishing
this will be a long struggle.
may contact Ali Khalid Abdullah directly by writing to him at the
address listed above. The following link offers tips for writing
to prisoners: http://prisonersolidarity.org/TipsForWritingPrisoners.htm